don't quit your day job, brain.

so, i dreamt an SNL sketch last night. spoiler alert: it was terrible.

i should start by saying - you know when you're having a dream, and in your dream-brain, something is understood but never actually explained? so, in my dream-brain, justin timberlake does a year-end SNL sketch that covers the year in tv/pop culture. so this was that sketch.

the cast:

harriet winslow
carl winslow
some white woman i can't remember (SWWICR)
alec baldwin as jack donaghy
tina fey as liz lemon
chris parnell as leo spaceman
tracey morgan as tracey jordan
judge reinhold as apparently some other doctor? i'm not clear on who he was.
janel moloney as donna moss
billy crystal as....harry? god only knows. i'm not clear on who he was either.
tim robbins as...tim robbins? possibly his character from anchorman.

the scene: jack's office

liz/tina: "wow jack, i can't believe the year is over, and i had no overview of this sketch and cannot approve anything i say to you."

alec/jack - says something i don't remember, but something like "i'm really gonna miss this office, kind of like how no one watches this show anymore"

this is where things really went off the rails....

judge reinhold comes in with tracey and chris parnell and they greet liz/tina and alec/jack -

it's now somehow turned into judge reinhold's office (in my dream-brain, it's an ongoing gag in 30 rock that he has an office but they only show the door, never the office)

judge reinhold: says something like "i'm excited to have an office!!"


leo spaceman/chris parnell: says something about spaceman says now he only gets two doors that open in on each other but no office (...i have no fucking clue)

somehow, then, the following join the room:

harriet winslow
billy crystal
carl winslow
tim robbins

tim robbins: "someone's been having an affair!"

everyone gasps

carl winslow steps forward and looks at SWWICR: "we've been having a chocolate and vanilla thing going on, it happened the night after the election"

harriet: "well, we've also got a chocolate and vanilla-"

billy crystal interrupts: "no, we've got a vanilla and hershey kiss thing going on here..."

*everyone looks uncomfortable*

donna/janel walks in and lays down on a couch that is now in this office, set in front of everyone, and sighs: "we've got a josh and donna thing going on too, and it's like the additive they put in bacon, it makes you sexy, smart, good at math and you can't get enough"


.....yeah. so, there's that. my brain wrote a terrible comedy sketch. or, more accurately, my brain ghost-wrote a comedy sketch for justin timberlake, because it was technically his. blame him.

the pop culture round-up that apparently is my subconscious:

*family matters
*west wing
*arrested development (judge reinhold reference)
*30 rock
*when harry met sally? city slickers? billy crystal in general? no idea how he got in there.
*anchorman (tim robbins was basically his public news team persona from anchorman, i think, the way he delivered his line)


oh, frank. part 23495

car commercial voiceover: "what do you want to leave behind for your children?"

mom: "a million dollars!"
dad: "a mountain of debt!"